That's right, you saw that correctly. No, I do not mean that I am planning to have this happen anytime soon to either myself or someone I love but I do like to think that when I die my family is not left wondering what to do next.
Hence, advance care planning. Check out advancecareplanning.ca if you want some excellent resources and a downloadable plan that pretty much takes care of everything. Truly. You can do it online, print it off and colour in the blank spots... really make it your own. In the classes I teach, the people I talk to about what I do, and pretty much anyone who brings up the topic of death, I always encourage they do an advance care plan.
But, here's the thing. I've started and not finished several of them. ARGH! I know the importance, in fact I've kept all of the versions in the event that someone can cobble them together to make me seem coherent. But I get frustrated because just as I've finished one thing, I think of something else and I've used up all of the room in that particular section. The online version at least will save things and, admittedly, allows for some haphazard thinking, but I just can't get right with it. I need it to be more fluid and flexible for my thought processes.
Then I had a brainwave. Well, it was more like a brain meander in that rather than the idea smoothly building and cresting into a moment of brilliance, my thoughts slowly formed as they collided around in my semi-conscious state one evening. I had been watching Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion (don't ask me why, I didn't even go to my own), and, after having thought about what sort of life I might make up if I did go back and how people would react if I explained I'm a death doula, I immediately thought of Post-Its. (If you do not know why this is relevant, guess what, you'll have to watch the movie - you're welcome).
Post-Its are perfect for that iterative, flexible planning that I like to do... they mean I can move things from section to section and leave them there or move them around. I can alphabetize my requests or group them according to care needs. Then, when I'm done (for now), I take a photo (automatically date-stamped) and file it under care plan!
Seriously, check out advance care planning. It's important for you and your family. But, do it your way....
I am just having such a great time imagining my children opening up a professional looking advance care planning document only to find a mass of Post-Its! Enjoy my lovelies!
